Moving on . . .

The Peanut (kind of funny considering how allergic she is to them) is down for her nap, I have just poured myself a peppermint tea and I think it is time for a little reflection.

As of yesterday, I have moved on from the detox and am now moving into the next phase. I know this is a couple of days early, but yesterday at the gym I once again became dizzy and nauseous about two thirds of the way through my training session. Frustrating because I am really back into what we are doing and I feel like my body is letting me down and I am letting down my trainer. Again my trainer asked what I had had for breakie and told her. It was her opinion that I needed either more protein or some complex carbohydrates to give me that extra fuel to get all the way through my workout. And honestly I was starving right around the time it hit, so yes, I bet I was just out of fuel.

So I decided to opt out a couple of days early from the detox so that I could make some changes to what I was eating and be ready to go for Monday at 9 a.m.! Today I had a combination of Flax Cereal and Oats, with a few raisins and some cinnamon, cloves and nutmeg for flavour. They were yummy and my system responded well to them. This was good fuel for our skating adventure this morning with Kelly and Connor. We had a great time, got some good exercise in, and came home with lots of energy.

This detox has been a real journey of exploration for me. I never thought I had issues around food, but have come to realize that that isn't necessarily the case. I love to eat there is no doubt, but I also don't like feeling deprived either. This is the biggest one. But what is deprivation? Dictionary.com lists the word deprive as to remove or withhold something from the enjoyment or possession of (a person or persons): to deprive a man of life; to deprive a baby of candy. I think it is funny that the second is the example they use. Baby's shouldn't have candy in the first place, so really, that is just good parenting. But I digress . . .

I think in the beginning I saw parts of this detox as being deprived of the things I love so much. But yet, these are the things that have really put a tax on my health, my energy, my system, my sanity. I can't say that I won't eat sugar ever again - I love cake - but I am going to try and continue to make better choices on the food front for me and my family. I have a child who really doesn't like sweets - I sometimes wish I was more like her.

Day 24

Well we are almost at the end of this Detox journey. I have to say that I am kind of glad about that. The last week has been particularly hard. Reasons - I need a little more variety in what I eat - like some red meat and being able to eat Oatmeal (the Steel Cut variety) in the morning along with my fruit. I also miss eggs which has surprised me a little.

I have to say that this has been a long and winding journey in which I think each of us Yummy Mummy's has truly learned the value that we place on food. For me, I have realized how I do love food - the taste, the smell, the family time, the conversations with great friends. Food brings us together - always has, always will. I have also realized how much I hate being limited in what I can eat. I have had to learn new inventive techniques for making, chicken and turkey exciting again, and again, and again. Thank goodness for being allowed fish because if I hadn't been able to mix things up with that, I would have caved week two.

I know I have learned healthier eating habits that will be of huge benefit to me and my family. From here on in it will be a case of making sure I incorporate this knowledge into our daily routine, instead of falling back on the old and easy ways. Now don't get me wrong, I am looking forward to bringing back some of my old favourites - bread, being one. But I will look for healthier alternatives like Ezekial bread or start making my own at home with the bread maker that has been in my basement for two years unused. Juicing will also continue to have a place in our house. I love fresh juice. My morning would not be complete without it and my Chia seeds! (Ch-ch-ch-chia - I know you are singing it too.)

Still, I have to admit that I am a little scared about what next week brings. My true fear lies in how I will deal with the first day off program - will I gorge on potato chips and steak (isn't that a picture) to the point of making myself sick or will I continue to take a step back and carefully watch what I consume - think about each thing I put on my plate, and ultimately how it will make me feel at the end of the meal.

I have been reading two really interesting books - Eating Clean Recharged by Tosca Reno and EAT THIS! NOT THAT! I know that Eating Clean will continue to be a big part of what happens going forward. I get what Tosca is trying to teach us. EAT THIS! NOT THAT! is truly eye opening for what happens in our restaurants, but beyond that, provides very interesting insight into the world of food in general. Both will be good resources in my kitchen.

When all is said and done, I know next week I will need to recommit to making myself the healthiest person I can be. That may have to happen for the next 52 weeks. If so, that is just the way it will have to be. I know I will have slip ups, I am only human after all. But instead of beating myself up, I will look at what I have done and move forward - maybe it will be another couple of weeks before I have that food again, maybe a couple of months. Either way, I am going to try to be the healthiest person I can be.

Skating

The feel of the ice as you glide over it is like no other for me. I love it and miss it. So why have I said that, keep reading.

Instead of heading to the gym this morning, I decided that Sophie and I would stay home and try to get a few things done around the house. Reason - my head is still on the verge of exploding and even though the workout would have been good for the hour, the after effect was not one I was ready to deal with today. Around 9:30 a.m., as I was deciding whether to have a shower or go fold the massive amounts of laundry in my bedroom I made a spontaneous decision - Sophie and I would go skating at the Parent/Tot Skate at Carling Arena. It is something I have wanted to check out since November. Today was the day that I was going to use the new skates that I bought two years ago. I was missing my old skates this morning which are broken in so well, but we will just have to keep going in order to get my new skates broken in as well.

So, we quickly got dressed and headed out the door. I was a little hesitant, well a lot hesitant, because it has been at least 8 years since I have been on skates. There was a very good chance that the 2 year olds just learning to skate were going to show me up. Well, I didn't fall! Success #1. Luckily I was able to hold onto the stroller the entire time, otherwise it wouldn't have been pretty. Success #2 - I lasted 15 minutes longer than I thought I would. I had said to myself on the ride over, even if I am done after 5 minutes, so be it. We actually made it 20 minutes! I think I could have gone longer except that I have a little girl who does not like to wear her mittens and as a result her hands were so cold by the end of the 20 minutes that it was time to leave. Next time I am duct taping her mittens on!

I am proud to have tried something "new" today. I feel great about getting out on the ice and know that we definitely go back again really soon. I also think it is important for Sophie to get out and see other kids doing different things. And she was very interested in watching the other kids skating on their own. I have no doubt that we will be strapping on her own skates very soon.

Headaches

I have always suffered from headaches. But today is a doosy! One of my reasons for doing the detox was to get the extra sugar out of my system which I am sure was causing some of them. Last night I decided to have an Epsom Salts bath, though I was leary because the last time I had one, I woke up with a screamer the next day too. I thought, well I really want to get the toxins out of me so let's see how it goes.

This time I made sure I drank lots of water and peppermint tea while in the tub and after. I made sure I didn't make the water as hot as last time. I sat back, relaxed and enjoyed the bath. Then I woke up this morning with a screamer again. Well actually it didn't become a screamer until about 9 a.m. but I knew what my day held for me when the "alarm" went off at 5:10 that was for sure.

Now I am sure that last night's crying episodes and wake up at 5:10 didn't help matters either. All in all, a bad combination of things. So as I sit here, and wish you all a good night, I am leaving my dishes undone from supper (my biggest peeve but I just can't do it), my basement still in an extreme state of chaos, the clean laundry in Sophie's room not put away and the laundry in my room will remain unfolded for one more day. Oh well, life will go on!

Dollies

I am sitting here watching Sophie play with her dollies. As a kid with two older brothers you would find me playing with cars, trucks and barns more so than dollies. I do remember getting my first teddy bear for my birthday when I was about five. I still have her, even though she is a little worse for wear these days.

No, I didn't play with dollies until I met my friend Denise. Then I had to have Barbies, and Cabbage Patch Kids. Well whatever Denise got, I had to have too! I think my mom hated hearing ". . . but mom, Denise has one so I HAVE to have one too." I just can't wait for that line in our house!

Sophie has always been a dolly/animal girl. Many mornings or after her nap you will find her sitting up in her bed just playing with her dollies and stuffed animals. Now don't worry, she is only allowed one teddy and one dolly and her glow worm and even then they don't make it in all the time.

What has surprised me is that she already has favourites - Willow who is a seedling dolly she got for her birthday from her friend Eva, Corolle who was also a birthday present from Auntie Reynolds, and an Upsie Daisy doll from In the Night Garden that I got for her when she was about four months old. She and Daisy are the same size so it is funny to watch her drag it around the house, and they go everywhere together. In fact, we were in the store the other day going past an In the Night Garden display and she put out her hand and said DAISY.

Crazy thing is I didn't plan for this to happen. It just did. I have realized lately that play is so important in her development. It teaches her to use her imagination. I have also noticed that she is very interested in knowing how things work - the engineering side of her brain no doubt. It is truly amazing, how even these early days help them determine who they will be down the road. Now if you will excuse me I have a tea party to attend . . .

Forgive me father . . .

. . . for I have sinned. No wait I am not Catholic and therefore cannot hail mary my way out of this. I do have a confession though.

So in my Skinny Panties blog I said that I had had a crappy week with the exception of the Jann Arden Concert on Wednesday night (thanks Shannon!). My week has been an emotional roller coaster of sorts. You see, there was a chance I was preggers again, and as it has turned out that isn't the case. Monday night when I was sitting with our group to talk about the Liver Detox it was the absolute last place I wanted to be. Not because of you girls, but because of how my body was feeling and where I was emotionally.

You see I was having symptoms of being pregnant. Absolutely crazy off the wall dreams, tiredness that would make your eyes pop out, no energy even during the day after my workouts and anger, uncontrollable anger. I guess this happened in my pregnancy with Sophie. Etienne said one day I was a nice, happy wife and the next day I was a bitch. It lasted until the end of the first trimester and the old me returned. I kept asking myself - Was I ready for this? Were we ready for this? Once I realized that I wouldn't need to find those answers, I knew. Yes I was ready for this and it made me sad that it wasn't going to happen.

So all week I have been truly questioning why I was still doing this Detox. I haven't done green juice all week - just couldn't be bothered. In the afternoons I wasn't hungry either so I didn't really miss it until I had to do the Aloe Vera Juice shot each afternoon. GAG! Today's with juice was much better.

I had enough morning juice from when I juiced on Tuesday to get me to today. I am tired of chicken and turkey, and fish for meats (Sorry guys, I have had an aversion to lamb since my last pregnancy). I want bread, bread and more bread. I didn't even eat that much bread before we started but it is the one thing I have constantly craved since starting, that and red meat.

So I tested myself tonight, we went out for dinner to a local establishment. When looking at the menu for myself I realized I was scanning for those things that would fit in with the program. Not a lot of selection I must say. Yes the salad would have filled the void nicely but yet I didn't have it. I had fajitas. I ate one tortilla with chicken, rice, vegis, tomatoes and lettuce. I refused the sour cream and cheese, and then left the rest of the tortillas in the container. It was good but I didn't need or want another. Instead I finished the lettuce, tomatoes, chicken and vegis and had a bit more rice - I know carbs and protein. I left the restaurant feeling full and proud that I had stopped at just one tortilla.

On our drive home I realized that developing a healthier lifestyle is important to me. We only have a week and half to go on the Liver Detox before we can start slowly incorporating certain components back into our food choices. I do have to say that I will definitely look at my food choices much differently from here on in.

Skinny Panties

Okay, so I will say that even though I am still miffed with the Goodlife and the ($*#&$*# the pulled before Christmas with my old trainer, I am beginning to get used to my new one and well she isn't as bad as I thought. Mind you she just doesn't stop talking which is kind of annoying when you are doing plank (which frankly is hard enough on its own) and getting asked small talk questions? Hey trainer - I need to focus otherwise I will end up face down on the mat. Come on!!!

So it also appears that I have some damage in my left knee which I was told to go and get a diagnosis on. This kind of sucks because it is making it really hard for me to do a lot of the leg exercises I should be doing. It really hurts. I knew there was something going on with it about a year ago but it comes and goes. The last couple of weeks have really made it worse or more aggravated because I am really being pushed during my training sessions.

And I have to say it is working - when I weighed in today because my day is Friday, I noticed that I have now lost 9 pounds in this Detox/Better Lifestyle Journey! Yeah me. I also put on a pair of heels today that I bought back in November for a wedding. I love these shoes and when I put them on today just because I wanted to wear them around my house - they fit. No need to stretch them out, they just fit!

I also put on what I call my skinny panties - I know strange. I have a bunch of big panties (my "fat pants"), that I was wearing before I got pregnant with Sophie and then of course these were the only ones that fit during and after, until now. Who knew how good putting on my skinny panties would make me feel especially after the week I have had, which with the exception of the Jann Arden concert Wednesday night, I would gladly like to forget and move forward.

Balance

Balance. I struggle with balance every single day. I have inner ear issues and a condition called BPPV (Benign Paroxsymal Positional Vertigo. This is when the crystal in your inner ear get trapped down in the inner canals where they aren't supposed to be. Thing is I have exercises that a vestibular therapist has taught me do on my own when I have an attack. It usually takes about a day for recovery but I can live with that.

My lack of core strength has also caused balance issues over the past two years. By doing this Detox and working out with my trainer regularly I am working to fix this balance issue too.

The one that I struggle with most is the life/work balance issues. To me life is all the fun stuff I do with my daughter and family. This really isn't a struggle because I see the joy that it brings her. I feel the happiness in my heart and soul that comes from watching her and being with her as she explores and discovers the world around her. Sophie is an adventurous toddler who is also very independent and I do struggle with how to keep her safe without smothering her and not letting her learn on her own. That is coming as she and I spend more time together learning from each other.

My real struggle comes from being a stay at home mom, and wanting to play and teach my daughter yet the work issues in keeping up with the laundry, making meals, cleaning, cleaning and more cleaning and eventually getting to the point where I can declutter and sort things out, don't seem to take of themselves. Where are the cleaning fairies, trolls and unicorns when you need them?

Now I have to admit that I am a bit of a pack rat. I come by it honestly, I come from a long line of pack rats. I was only 12 and I can still remember how long and hard it was to sort through my grandmothers apartment after she died. And when my parents moved from the farm where I grew up two years ago, the packing, sorting and decluttering was horrendous. The fights between parents who rarely fight, having to be the peacekeeper and "adult" in the room that week leading up to the move is probably the hardest thing I have ever done - and imagine being eight months pregnant at the time. I swore after the move that I would go home and start decluttering my life and getting rid of things I don't need, use or want anymore. I am still waiting for that day to happen.

It isn't even the decluttering that gets to me most. Everyday I try to have a plan of what I want to try and get done. Some days I am successful and knock a couple of things off the list. Other days it is a disaster zone in my house. Right now I know there is at least three loads of laundry needing to be done, the dishes are piled across the counter because I haven't done them since last night, supper needs to started and as it is 4 p.m., it is that time of the day when Sophie really wants me to play with her. I am lucky that I have a child who is very good at playing on her own, but there are too many times when I say "Just one more thing Sophie, and mommy will be there to play." Well then something else always comes up.

Even as I sit here and type I am thinking of all the fun and not so fun things I could and should be doing. I know that I will eventually sort this out and determine what works for us. In the meantime, if I win the lottery, I like Shannon am hiring Peter Walsh to come and help me sort out my clutter and I will hire the necessary people to help me around the house so that I can do what I want to do most - spend time with my beautiful daughter and family without the guilt.

Yuck!

Yesterday, despite being tired from our issues with sleep over the last week, I still felt great. Today, and as I write this, I feel like absolute crap. Today was definitely better than yesterday food wise, but last night I had the weirdest sleep. I was soooooo tired. I actually woke up at one point and said to Etienne (after he had just crawled back into bed) "Is that Sophie crying? Has she been crying long?" He said I didn't even wait for his response and was back to sleep instantly. Oops!

I even had an hour and half nap this afternoon and it is 7:44 and I can't wait to get back to bed. I know that Sophie was fighting a fever yesterday but I really thought it was teething related. Maybe it was more than that. I guess we will have to see how the next couple of days go.

Good night everyone. Here's hoping tonight's sleep is a little more normal.

Day 11

Well hard to believe that it is Day 11 in this Detox already. I was just settling onto the couch to post an update and my dear hubby walked through the door - 2:04 p.m. what a nice surprise. Sophie is also asleep and hopefully down for a good long winter's nap. She certainly needs it today - she has had a fever since this morning and has a very sore mouth. Poor little Peanut. I hope she is better soon.

So in 11 days what have I learned - the first thing that pops into my head is that I really like Peppermint Tea. I am just waiting for my current cup to steep and cool a little. Oh little minty pleasure, I can't wait.

What else have I learned? My favourite juice combination is strawberry, pineapple, clementine and grape!!! My favourite green juice combination is carrots, apples, cilantro and kale. Goat Cheese is yummy but if you eat too much of it in one day, you will suffer the consequences. Eventually those consequences will pass (wink, wink, nudge, nudge) but it will take time.

I think the one thing that I knew but hadn't incorporated into my life was food preparation. I have prepped veggi's ready to go in the fridge for lunch, snacks and supper. It makes times like today when I didn't get lunch until after 1 p.m. a lot easier. I didn't even have to think about what to make, and the stress was gone.

I am also pleasantly surprised that eating fruit only in the morning makes me feel so much better for the rest of the day. And who knew it, but I am actually beginning to like black coffee. I sprinkle cinnamon on my grinds before brewing and I really think it helps to cut the bitterness. Who knew!!

I, like some of the other girls, have also noticed that I have more patience these days than ever before. Which is good, because the last few days have really pushed these to the limit. I know this to will pass and my happy-go-lucky child will return, and I know this is something she must go through as she develops and grows. I also know it won't be the worst thing that will ever happen in her life to make her upset, but as a parent I want to voraciously protect my child and keep the pain away. HEY MOM - I GET IT NOW!

Overall, on top of feeling better, and my clothes fitting better, I really feel like I can tackle some of the more difficult things that need to be tackled - like decluttering this house and creating a household budget. LADIES - I am so proud of our group for sticking to this and sticking together to get through the rough patches. A real sense of accomplishment ladies, a real sense of accomplishment.

PS. To Tim Horton's - could you possibly stop running the Wheel of Donuts commercial for the next two weeks. I still really want one every time I see it. Thanks.

Dear Mommy . . .

I know that you love me very much. Know that I love you very much too! I know that the last few days have been particularly hard for us both, especially at night, because of something you call molars. To me it feels like there are big mountains errupting in my mouth and this has been waking me up in the middle of the night because it hurts so bad.

Thank you for being so patient with me though and letting me snuggle with you so that I feel safe, loved and not scared. But don't think I haven't noticed your tears too at 3 in the morning when we have been up for an hour already and you know it will be at least one more before I can get back to sleep. I also know that last night was hard. I have to admit, getting to sleep with you until daddy came home was way more fun than sleeping in my own bed. But when I was going to sleep my mouth hurt so bad.

Don't worry I didn't let daddy off the hook at 12 when he tried to put me in my bed so he didn't have to sleep on the floor again, like at Grandmaman's in December. And when I had to get you up at 2:30 to come comfort me again it was because my mouth hurt and I wanted to feel the steadiness of your breath to help me calm down and go back to sleep. You have to admit I did go back to sleep after only an hour last night, though I did get you up at 6:30 this morning. What can I say, I couldn't wait to see you again. ;)

I really hope that these molar things and my eye teeth? finish up real soon. Because like you, I need a goodnight's sleep too. What is with hitting the gym so much these days lady? Are you trying to wear me out so I will nap? I see through you plan. Hehehe!

Mommy - just remember one small little thing. I LOVE YOU!

Love Sophie

What do I want for myself this summer?

Carol asked us to answer this question yesterday. My first response was the following - I want to be gone with the headaches that usually keep me house bound on the beautiful days of the summer. I want to play outside with Sophie and work on my gardens without getting winded after 10 minutes. Like the others I want a new summer wardrobe or at least cute tops! When I go to the local wading pool I don't want to feel self concious. I also want to sit in and by Shannon's pool and celebrate with my friends.

I realize that though I want each of these things there is one more thing that just didn't make it onto the list - I want to be pregnant with our second child.

Now we have been asked to answer the following questions - What are you willing to do to make your dreams come true? What are you willing to sacrifice to make all of this happen for you?

Now that I have a toddler I realize even more today, how important it is to develop healthy eating habits. When I was 5 or 6, my mom made fried eggs for me for breakfast because in a family of five it is easier to make one kind than different kinds for everyone. She sat my plate down in front of me and put ketchup on it thinking that would encourage me to eat it. Well, it is just recently that I have actually started eating fried eggs or sunnyside up. The yolk on its own always grossed me out. A fight at the table ensued where I was forced to take a few bites. After that I immediately went into the washroom and threw it back up. My mother has actually admitted that she wondered if I had a life of bulimia in front of me. Well that certainly hasn't been the case because I certainly do love food - mostly that which is extremely bad for me (can anyone say BIG MAC)! Well that needs to change - NOW!

What am I willing to do to make my dreams come true? What am I will to sacrifice to make this happen for me?

Goal #1 - BE ACTIVE! I will continue to go to the gym to workout two to three times a week - whether that be treadmill, weights or hitting a class. Since returning last fall to the gym, I realize how much better I feel, how much more energy I have and how much better I sleep when I do. I will encourage Sophie to be active with me, whether that is running around the backyard, weeding the garden, going to the pool for a swim or just dancing in the livingroom.

Goal #2 - WATCH WHAT I EAT AND WHEN! This Detox has been good for me because I woke me out of the food stuper I have been in since giving birth. Once we have completed the full session with the Liver Detox, I will continue to tweak and create a food lifestyle that is best for me and my body. As getting rid of my headaches is my number one thing, I will continue to track when they hit. I have noticed a return to the pattern that they are tied to my cycle, which they mainly were before I got pregnant. If that is the case I need to determine what my body is lacking nutrionally and add it back in to my diet.

With these two pieces in place I will no doubt be able to fulfill the rest of my original list. As for being pregnant, again both of these goals will hopefully help that happen. If not though, Goal #3 - not to get stressed about it. What is meant to be will be.

Enough said . . .

May today there be peace within. May you trust that you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith in yourself and others.. May you use the gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be content with yourself just the way you are.. Let this knowledge settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us..

My love/hate relationship with my scale!

So before I started this detox I would occassionally get on the scale to see if things were good, bad or ugly. Usually they would end up on the ugly end of the scale but oh well! Now that I have seen some decrease I am obsessed with what that little piece of electronics that sits quietly mocking me under my bathroom sink,says.

In fact I was so obsessed that one day last week I got on it at four different times during the day! Four times. Who needs to get on a scale four times in one day. Well obviously I did but why? I asked myself that the next day when I remembered what I had done and realized that maybe I have a problem. There I said it - the first step is admitting you have a problem, right?

So the question is why? I like the feeling of success I get when I get on the scale and the number is down. To me, that is a better feeling than my tops, or bras or pants fitting better (which they are by the way) or me even just feeling healthier with more energy. I also think I was checking throughout the day to see what the scale said after certain points of the day with different clothing combinations. I know - CRAZY!, but I couldn't help it.

What I have realized in writing this is that, even though I know I shouldn't put so much weight on what the scale says, it is still important to me and how I see myself. Numbers going down mean success. But maybe I can be more normal about how many times a week I check to see how I am doing. Still, I must remember that if the number stalls or goes up, I need to give myself a little break from the scale. Why? Because if it doesn't go down I will get frustrated and mad with myself and quit! End of story. I have done Weight Watchers three times and I "failed" because the number didn't go down the way they wantede them too, even though I was working out, eating better, feeling better and my clothes were fitting way better.

An aside - A month ago I was in my last Pilates session with that trainer at the gym (long story but I am still mad at Goodlife for getting rid of her). I started working out again back in September (to me that is the beginning of the year - not January for some reason) because I knew I needed to do this for me and for Sophie. Working out during the day is great because I can drop the Peanut in child minding and go have time for myself (Lisa that is the only way I get it in most days).

Anyway, I digress. I am working out with Jeanie and I look at her after doing a rather difficult move and say "WOW! Two months ago I would never have thought that move would be easy to do!" I was so impressed with what I had accomplished, I came home that night and showed my hubby who was also impressed because his stomach muscles are missing too!

Today as I sit here I am sure that that move would once again be difficult to do but I remember how good it felt to have stomach strength after 15 months of no strength, so on the off days that I am not at the gym with my new trainer (who is a drill sargeant - not as bad a Jillian yet) I resolve to head into my basement and attempt to get back into Pilates (which I realized I really miss). I also realized that when I was working out in the fall - I would only get on the scale once a week to see how things were going! Hhhhhmmmmmm! Maybe, just maybe, myscrewed up relationship with my scale could be normal again.

I want a donut!

I haven't really craved sweets much since starting and then all of a sudden today I just want a donut. It doesn't even matter what kind, I just want one, well maybe two or three. I don't think I could stop if I started, so instead I sit here eating my pre-supper apple and drink my water and try to think up more exciting recipes I can cook for my family.

I bought a bag of Rice Flour at the grocery store the other day. My next recipe search will be for dishes that use rice flour. That is the one thing I have realized in the last 6 days of detoxing - I truly love hunting for that incredible recipe and then can't wait to try it out. Or for that fact, taking one that is tried and true and adjusting it so that it works for us today.

I think I had forgotten how much I love to cook even though it does get boring and routine for me some days. (The fight scene of Bridget Jones is just on - ah classic!!)I pledge to try to find a new recipe once a week! Wish me luck!

Day 4 & 5- January 8/9, 2010

Still feeling good even though I had a killer of a headache that hit just after dinner last night. Went from 0 to 60 in 3.2 seconds! Hence why my notes from day 3 just kind of drop off. Ended up taking an Advil around midnight and it seems to be gone today! Cross our fingers. Got on the scale - no change - but that is okay!

It appears I really didn't journal anything in my note book about these two days but I know it is in my email.

Day 4
Hey friends! Sorry I have been out of touch! Life has been very busy the last two days and yesterday well I was so grumpy in the morning (Shannon can attest to that) that I just wanted to hibernate.

I am so proud of everyone. What we are doing is not easy but we are doing this to be better us'! Every now and then when I want to cave, Sophie gives me a pep talk (at least this is what I pretend she is doing when she goes on a ramblefest - so cute). I am craving bread and crackers of all things and I don't even eat that much of them.

Last night for supper I made myself homemade fresh spring rolls (rice noodles, rice paper wrappers, cucumber, carrots, bean sprouts) and natural wasabi ( I found at Sobeys). It was good but I needed a dip - lying in bed I thought you could mix almond butter with rice vinegar but don't have any of the latter. Next trip to the grocery store I guess.

What I am starting to do is figure out the day before what I am going to make the next day, that way if I don't have the items in the house I can run out to the grocery store (though getting tired of that - and I love the grocery store. I suspect it is all the stuff I want to get (like bread!)). I have also done prep on my vegis so they are ready to go.

Today was good but it required planning - we had little gym this morning and I needed to make sure I had enough fuel to keep up. I did a shot of coconut oil this morning to help fuel me more. I still didn't eat lunch - leftover springrolls - until 1 which is way too late. I tucked into vegis and hummus this afternoon and that was yummy.

Here is my recipe for the week - Stuffed tomatoes and Peppers with Garlic and Herb Goat Cheese Feta.

I browned ground chicken with onions and garlic and then added vegis - carrots, green pepper, cauliflower, celery. I cored the tomatoes and green pepper and then stuffed the chicken mixture inside. I topped a couple of them with the Garlic and Herb Goat Cheese Feta I found at No Frills today. They baked for 1/2 hour at 375 and were yummy. It was easy to make and while I was cooking I ate my apple and water. We just gave Sophie the chicken mixture and peas and she was a happy girl. I also have in the oven right now tomatoes which I am roasting so that I can make Chili tomorrow in the slow cooker. I have leftovers of the Chicken mixture which I will throw in to the pot.

Day 5
Hey all. I think the frustration has finally hit for me. I woke up feeling bloated and gross this morning after four mornings of feeling great when I got up. I also got on the scale this morning and it was up enough to make me want to throw in the towel. I think I did okay yesterday - water, apple, breakie was a banana, juice around 9 and then fruit all morning, stuffed tomato at lunch with ground chicken, green juice in the afternoon around 2, almonds to snack on and then turkey chili for supper and as we ate at 4:30 yesterday I had vegis and hummus around 630 because I was hungry again. I will watch what I eat after supper if we eat that early again and reverse the hummus and vegis in the afternoon and almonds at night.

It may have had something to do with my night - I was up with Sophie from 11:50 to 1:15 and then as I was going to let her cry it out, Etienne took over and she finally settled to sleep around 2 but of course I was lying awake trying to figure out what is causing these 2 hour weekly little stints. Then she started crying in her sleep from about 5:15 to 7:15 when she did wake up for the day, so I had sporadic sleep from then. Sophie also had quite a big spill yesterday, though she is fine, my mom guilt is in overdrive still.

We have just had breakfast - this morning I had banana and clementines (2) cut up. Yum I am having my coffee early today as I am a little tired. I probably should have had the tea first but caffeine was on my mind. I am going to push through today but I think I need to refocus myself. Sophie and I also need to get out of this house today. I am feeling a little cabin feverish and I know that isn't helping either.

Be Strong and wishing each of you a fantastic day!

Day 3 - January 7, 2010

Day 3 - well that is good. Day 2 was hard but again I wake up feeling better, less bloated, lighter and more energetic. Better night sleep last night and not up until after 7 am. Yeah Peanut!! Also, I am down 2.4 more pounds! Double Yeah!

Wakeup routine - check

For breakie I had banana and clementines! I also had an extra CO in the am as we had a gym class to go to for the Peanut and I needed to make sure I had the energy to keep up! Had my juice and Chia (which I have been having since day 1) while Peanut and I went to the grocery store again. Yes again. Something about eating 3 apples a day and putting it in juice that you go through them pretty fast. I picked up some ground chicken and turkey and fresh basil and some regular stuff for my house so they wouldn't starve.

Once we got home we started the lunch routine - water, apple and then had leftovers from day 2 supper of spring rolls. Still forgot to get the rice wine vinegar. I had vegis and hummus in the afternoon along with my green juice - which was carrots, celery, parsley, cilantro and apple (I think).Supper was Tomatoes and Green Peppers stuffed with ground chicken and vegis. It was yummy too.

Uusual evening routine and off to bed. Will see what tomorrow holds.

Day 2 - January 6, 2010

Well woke up feeling lighter but 5:20 am is just too early to be awake! Fortunately I got the Peanut back to sleep for about another hour but I have to say I was a super grump for most of the day. But on a good note I was down 2 pounds!!!! What!

Water, Apple, D3 and Sea Power - Check
Breakfast - Banana and Tea - Check - I need to eat more at breakie! I snacked on Pear throughout the morning and that helped.
Juice which I made enough for 2 days (cleaning my juicer is not fun) consisted of clementine, grapefruit, apple and grapes (YUMMY!)
Black coffee - Check - I also put cinnamon in with my grounds and it was good! Cut the bitterness.
Lunch - Salad with chicken and vinagrette. I didn't actually get to finish my salad becasue all of a sudden the Peanut decided she was in need of a nap. Wasn't really hungry though.
Afternoon - I added apple to my green juice from the day before and it was better!
Supper - I made fresh vegi spring rolls with rice noodles (really little ones), rice paper wrappers, carrots, and cucumber. I would definitely add Cilantro next time and create a dipping sauce from Almond Butter and Rice Wine Vinegar.
CO and Tea as required!

As Wednesday is my long day - hubby is out - I went to bed soon after getting the Peanut to bed.

Day 1 - January 5, 2010

I have to say that initially I was really skeptical of doing this detox. Would it be something I could stick to? When you receive a shopping list that includes things like kale, dandelion greens, bok choy, well for me anyway, the negative voice in my head goes off and says- "Yeah right, you are going to do this". I could even hear the sarcastic laughter. But this year was going to be different, as my New Year's Resolution I decided to try and turn the negative voice in my head off and be more positive and stay in the present.

Day 1 - January 5, 2010 - Everyone else started on the 4th but I needed to get some groceries and make sure my juicer worked. I was unwell over New Year's Eve and was finally feeling better when we met on the 3rd to go over the program. I also think I needed an extra day to reread everything, make notes and get myself mentally prepared or as prepared as I could possibly be.

I have to say Day 1 for me went quite well, despite getting on the scale and seeing a number that horrified me! Oh well you have to start somewhere.

Water, Apple and D3 tabs, no Sea Power as the store was out. After my 1/2 hour wait I had a banana and strawberries and half a pear for breakie. I also fit in my Peppermint Tea and a black cup of coffee. My juice that morning consisted of clementines, grapefruit, and apple. My daugther also went down for a nap so I joined her (good idea).

Lunch was late because I had to return to the grocery store for things I couldn't get the night before! GRRRRR! But I had my water and apple and then for lunch a big green salad with chicken. I created a vinagrette of Balsamic vinegar, olive oil, garlic, dry mustard (just a pinch) and pesto seasoning from Epicure. I thought I would miss the croutons but surprisingly no! Had lots of other crunch instead. Followed that with the Coconut Oil and Peppermint Tea.

Green Juice - well not my favourite but I tried - carrots, kale, parsley and dandelion greens. Yuck! I snacked on almonds in the afternoon and for supper had baked chicken with Holiday Seasoning and stirfry vegi's. Followed that up with CO and tea and went to bed as soon as the Peanut was in bed! We will see how we feel tomorrow.

Am I really blogging?

Well, this is a first for me. For a long time I have wanted to set up a blog but never did it. Why is this particular Sunday morning in January different. Well, it is just time and besides all my friends on the detox are doing it so why shouldn't I at least try!

I will add more later about how my first five days of the CALM MUM DETOX have gone but first I need to have some breakie.